5 signs of a toxic partner-- And how to deal with them

A healthy relationship is built on love, respect, trust, support, and open communication. But sometimes, love can cloud our judgment. So much so that we end up missing the early red flags of toxic behaviours in the relationship. A toxic partner can drain your energy, damage your self-esteem, and keep you trapped in a cycle of negativity. This makes recognising these signs early on important for protecting your emotional and mental well-being.

A toxic partner often disguises their jealousy or cruelty towards you as “honest” feedback or conversation. After speaking to them, instead of feeling uplifted and energised, you feel low emotionally. They often point out your flaws, make sarcastic comments at your expense, or keep bringing up their. Over time, this can shatter your self-confidence and make you question your worth.

How to deal with it: If they belittle you, set clear boundaries about what kind of behaviour you will and won't accept. Stand up for yourself calmly and assertively. If the pattern continues despite honest conversations, consider seeking support from a therapist, or seriously rethink the relationship.

While some amount of possessiveness is okay for couples, but if a partner tries to control your every move — then it isn't normal. From how you dress to who you talk to — if your partner is excessively controlling, then it is a huge red flag which shouldn't be ignored. Control might be masked as "caring" or "protection," but it’s rooted in insecurity and dominance, not love.

How to deal with it: Reassert your independence and stand up for yourself. Remind yourself (and your partner) that healthy relationships are built on mutual trust, not ownership. If they react with anger or threats, it’s a strong indicator that the relationship may not be safe or sustainable in the long run.

Gaslighting is when a partner twists the facts to make you doubt your memory, feelings, or sanity. Phrases like “You’re overreacting” or “That never happened” are typical gaslighting tactics. This emotional manipulation leaves you confused, doubting yourself, and dependent on your partner.

How to deal with it: Trust your instincts. Talk to trusted friends or a counsellor who can help validate your experiences. If the pattern continues and affects you deeply, then maybe leaving them would be the healthiest choice.

Toxic partners often blame others for their own mistakes and refuse to take any responsibility for their actions. If you often experience the same with your partner, then it shows their emotional immaturity and lack of empathy.

How to deal with it: Call out the behaviour respectfully but firmly. Hold them accountable for their actions without getting drawn into their blame game. Understand that you’re not responsible for their behaviour, and if accountability never comes, you may need to step away for your own growth.

Does your partner often love to bomb you? Are they very affectionate one day, and extremely cold the other? Or do they withhold their affection and love to punish you or control you? So much so that it leaves you feeling isolated and unwanted. Well, then this is not normal in a relationship and should be recognised as a big red flag.

How to deal with it: Communicate your needs openly and see how they respond. A caring partner will make an effort to meet you halfway, while a toxic one will continue to withhold love as a form of control. Don't settle for emotional starvation — you deserve consistent love and respect. Even after repeatedly saying if your partner doesn't treat you well, then maybe it's time to move on in life.